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Guy Friend Tries To Kiss Me In Front Of Everyone-- Then Doesn't Call/email!


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#1 Guest_fnbrngrl_*

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Posted 12 November 2006 - 10:23 PM

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Help!
I've got this guy friend who I went to school with about 5 yrs ago-- I was married at the time, he was single/ dating so nothing ever really happened between us--
I'm now separated/ soon to be divorced, he knows my story with my ex--
There was this get-together last Thursday night and I emailed him that I'd be going to it-- he said he'd wait for me till i got there cause we've got a lot to catch up on--
I went with a girlfriend to the bar, he was there with a bunch of mutual friends as well as a whole lot of people I didn't know. Being the social type-- I noticed he worked the room, but practically avoided my table with my girlfriend-- it seemed like he would head our way then somehow get sidetracked.
Anyways, after we ate, i went to socialize with everyone. I approached the group he was talking with, and he immediately slipped his arm around my waist, then he tickled my ear. So I slipped my arm around his waist, tickled him a little and stayed like that for a bit.
Then another girl came up, chatted with him and drew him away from me, so off I went to the bar for a drink, and met a few other ppl.
Soon after, I decided that my friend and I should leave so I went to say bye to him. The usual hug, peck on the cheek, but I got the impression he wanted to smooch me on the lips. SO i turned my face so he'd catch my cheek-- and laughed. He tried again, same response. and again so I let him catch the corner of my mouth this time and smiled. Then this guy who was sitting right next to where we were standing said-- Whoa that was hot! Are you two together? Then Pete (my friend) and I say no at the same time-- and pete jokingly says she can give you a kiss if you like-- To which I said-- No-- only for you Pete! then we kiss again-- he catches my cheek again-- twice then before I leave he whispers we should have dinner to catch up on things. To which I nod yes, sure.
As i"m leaving-- I look back and he's following me out by looking at me- so I motioned to him to calll me. and smiled.

I've sent him an email on Friday just to say I'm free next friday if he'd like to have dinner. But I haven't heard from him or gotten a response!-- ANY help would definitely be appreciated!!!

#2 Guest_Bigs_*

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Posted 13 November 2006 - 06:15 AM

Calm down, its only been two days since you last heard from the guy. He is just waiting for the right time to call you so that he does not seem desperate. obviously, he is into you. Just give him a little more time to get in touch with you or just call him yourself. Personally, I love it when a girl takes the initiative to call me back since it shows that she has confidence and is independent.

#3 Guest_fnbrngrl_*

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Posted 15 November 2006 - 12:13 AM

Ok Bigs-- so check this out--
So I emailed him and said basically that I'm free on Friday nts if he wants to meet up to give me a call-- That was last Friday--

There's this common friend ( a girl named Inna who went to school with us and she just got married, she works with Pete) who's trying to arrange a sort of re-union thing for a dinner or sthg, so we've talked and emailed a couple of times-- and today I get this email from Pete-- and all it said was "Try to email Inna" and her email addy. PERIOD. Nothing else--!!!! no hi, how's it going? nothing!

So I emailed Inna, said when's good for me for the get-together, and told her I'd be at a house party on Dec 2nd so that's no good. Inna emails me back in 20mins and says "we'll be at the same party, and we'll see you at Lilli's" so she postpones the dinner till January-- no specific date--
Then I emailed Pete thanks for inna's addy, and that I've emailed her and "r we still on for Friday nt?"
then a "bye" that's it--

I dunno-- but sthg seems fishy here-- is Pete being shy? does he regret trying to kiss me? Is he asking Inna to set sthg up?

Guys-- any ideas would help!!!!!

so the latest is that Pete emailed me that he was busy this friday working on the xmas party thing for his workplace-- (he does amazing skits) and how about next friday?
So I replied-- no problem but I'd love to come by tp see his skit at the xmas party--(fishing for an invite to the party)
SO far-- no response!
I've even left a message on his voicemail to ssay I got his email reply and I'd luv to come to the party but again-- no response--
HELP!!!!

#4 Guest_maria_*

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Posted 18 November 2006 - 10:51 PM

My advice is stop pushing it and fishing for invites. If he is interested he will let you know, you haven't really given him the chance to show any interest. Your desire for him to show his intentions towards you can be off putting. Stop sending e-mails and calling telling him you received his messages. It can come off needy and insecure. He hasn't even taking the steps to starting anything with you, yet you're already crowding him. Most men don't like to be told what to do and when not interested or put off by a woman they won't call.

Everything seemed to have started off like a courtship dance and then you flipped the switch and started a full on press. Let it unravel on it's own.

#5 Guest_fnbrngrl_*

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Posted 23 November 2006 - 02:08 AM

Update--
So I got an email from him saying he's been run down with a bad cold for about a week now, but he wanted to know if I still wanted to go to the xmas party--
So I replied sure, let me know the details and I'll be in touch--
and I've decided to pull back like maria suggested--patience does have its virtues--
Thanks!

#6 Guest_maria_*

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Posted 23 November 2006 - 02:15 AM

I wish you the best with it. Remember most men like to chase a little bit, that's not to say you don't show interest. They also need to feel wanted and needed. You just have to strike a balance. All the best.

#7 Guest_fnbrngrl_*

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Posted 03 December 2006 - 08:48 PM

SO here's some background and an update--
He and I work in the same field, but at 2 different hospitals--We have a lot of mutual friends as well. So there's this housewarming party last night and I emailed him to ask if he wanted a ride to the party-- he responded yes, and said i din't HAVE to drop him back home (coz it's out of my way) he'd bum a ride off s1 there--
So I totally glammed up, picked him up at the station, I know he liked what he saw-- u could just tell--the way he did the hello hug/cheek-cheek, the wide eyes, smile-- and we chatted all the way up to the house-- establishing that we were both available- and what we were looking for--flirting with each other-- i touched his knee casually as we talked--kept open body language-- teased, laughed, complimented etc. and it went both ways with the conversation--
The party was great-- we shared a plate, sat with each other most of the time, it looked like we were "together" got each other drinks etc. then it so happened we were the last ones to leave-- so I'm thinking-- "ok when i drop him off I'll finally get that kiss I've been fantasizing about"--
the conversation back was pretty much the same as going up to the party-- this time we were talking about a guy i used to have a crush on, and Pete starts saying stuff like-- well "He's a loser, he can't even bench press half of what I can"-- so i said "so u think u can bench press a lot, eh? and we bantered some more--it was almost like he was trying to prove he was the better guy--(so i'm thinking-- GOOD-- he IS interested in me)
Now on Friday nt i went to a club and had asked pete to come out with us-- he refused saying that sort of thing was too pretentious and he wouldn't go to sthg like that ever-- I even heard him saying this at the party when a cpl people asked him if he'd gone to the club
so driving home (after the talk about how much better a guy he was) I said, "you know, u should really come out with me to the club sometime" and he says-- "sure, next time I'll come, just let me know" in this sort of quiet type voice--
so I'm thinking OK!!!! he's definitely interested---
we get to his place-- much faster than i thought--and I pull up to the front of the bldg, stop the car, take off my seatbelt, turn to him and said it was great that u came and we did the hug, and our lips just "brushed" coz it's like he turned his cheek!!!!and then he was gone!!!
Now I'm TOTALLY confused!!!
does anyone know what to make of this???

#8 Guest_fnbrngrl_*

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Posted 06 December 2006 - 02:56 AM

we're to meet up at his workplace's xmas party-- he arranged for the ticket for me--(i'm paying my own so it's not like he's taking me), he's sent me a map, and also told me that he's wearing a suit (i'm taking the hint to really dress up) and the time he'll be there from, and to call him on his cel when I arrive! --Wish me luck!!

#9 Guest_raincoatsss_*

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Posted 07 December 2006 - 10:07 AM

I'm glad your relaxing a bit towards him. Coming from very recent experience, I must say; don't push.

The following is just a personal experience, no intention of hijacking your thread:
A girl I was CASUAL friends with from school started to call me everyday after something like two weeks. I hung out with her once, outside of school (actually to write a paper) but things turned rediculous from that point on. It wasn't so much the calling that bothered me, it was how possessive and jealous she would act when I thought of her only as a friend. She eventually started giving me things; cd's, movies, books, etc...all of which I returned to her, but knew at that point I had to break contact as she was becoming more than I cared to handle.

So the moral: Although it can be really hard at times, keep a clear head and try not to idealize someones reality into a fantasy world. There's nothing wrong with crushing on someone, just don't loose sleep over it.

#10 Guest_fnbrngrl_*

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Posted 09 December 2006 - 05:59 PM

UPDATE!!!
so last nt i went to the xmas party for my friend's workplace-- He arranged for the tkt, and i was sposed to collect it at the door and pay for it-- I got there and some common friends were the door keepers.
They acted kinda "cute" funny saying-- i didn't have to pay for it-- The girls had given me a dinner chit anyways-and said I should take it up with Pete-- I said ok-- and entered.
Pete was busy since he was the organizer/host of the whole thing so i didn't want to bother him--so i hung out with some other friends in the meanwhile--
Finally when i saw him relaxed a bit i got another friend to walk up to say hello to him-- He was very enthusiastic when he saw me and pulled a dinner chit from his jacket pocket for me-- saying this is so u can have dinner with a wink--I was surprised so i said, but i already got one from the front door--
(I guess i'll sort it out with him if he calls-coz it seems he may have paid for me after all)
we chatted then he got distracted/busy again.
most of the evening he hosted so we didn't spend any time together.
then when dinner was being served i asked another guy friend to get Pete a plate since he was still on the stage "doing stuff"
after the show, dancing began and Pete hung around with us for a bit--
I asked him if he wanted to dance, he said he can only dance to slow songs and smiled-- I said okay and off i went to have fun.
Finally they played a slow song--my fave--Hinder's Lips of an angel--so i went up to him, and he immediately went to dance with me-- it was amazing-- the chemistry was awesome-- we teased each other as we danced, i rested my head on his shoulder, he pulled me in closer, he even commented "you're melting" and i replied "that's cause you're so hot"and we smiled at each other--
sounds like it's going well eh? but check this out! the first thing he says when we start to dance is "so you got a room at the delta?"
and i said "yes, dyu want to come over later?"
and he says" i'll be too tired to perform"
and i said" doesn't matter." and snuggled closer to him as we danced--
so I'm thinking OKAY he's DEFINITELY interested in getting together with me--
after the dance, we hung around with friends for a bit then drifted away separately. (he's VERY popular)
we made contact off and on through the rest of the night-- then when it wrapped up, I asked him if he'd come back with me-- (mind you I was VERY tipsy then)
and he refused! saying he had to clean up, and would be too exhausted to "do anything"
i was so sad.
then i overheard him saying to some people that he and a few others including a girl who i think has the hots for him will be going to another guy's(brian's) place afterwards.
I was really sad then--
so my friends Amy, Sue and Jerry walked me back to the hotel and i went to bed--
That was my night!
what dyu guys think is going on???




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