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Okay, heres the deal. I've been fairly good friends with this girl I used to work with a while ago, but it was just that... friends, until a couple weeks ago when we started talking. A lot... I had no problem talking to her then and conversation flowed like water for hours on end and it was fantastic, then we started arranging little meet ups for dinner, or movies, or whatnot and eventually it was pretty clear to both of us that we were interested in eachother, so I kissed her one day as I was leaving, and she deffinitely kissed me back... she even giggled and told me she had been waiting for that.
Anyways, fast forward to the next day, well we started talking again but it seemed a little different. Things seemed awkward and I could no longer think of anything to say really... and it seems like she is feeling the same way, now each day it seems to be getting progressively more awkward. I can't speak for her as I'm not exactly sure what she's thinking but it seems as though she's feeling the same sense of awkwardness. Is this a natural phase in a relationship, or have I done something to make it weird or offend her? Or will it just pass in time? Or is this just a sign that things aren't meant to be? Please help! I really like this girl and I just wish it wasn't so awkward anymore. The fact that we had such an easy time talking to eachother before tells me that it's possible for it to be like that again, but I dont know... i'm still kind of new to all this.
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Conversation Seemed Awkward And I Could No Longer Think Of Anything To Say
MultiQuote#2 Guest_Bud_*
Posted 11 September 2006 - 10:19 AM
Dear Peejay
Although your situation is quite peculiar it by no means indicates that you were not meant to be together and neither does it signify anything bad. In that you have had flowing conversations with her before is definitily a positive that you can aim for again.
It might not be a bad idea to share your feelings with her on the present situation and see what she thinks of the whole ordeal. From the things that you have described previously it is obvious that there is a mutual amount of attraction and interest from both sides. Perhaps if you lay it out on the table for the both of you to
see you might be able to figure out a way to deal with the situation together.
It might be the case that you want to start doing a common activity like doing a puzzle or going for a game of bowls that will start the conversation going again. Think of activities that the both of you can do together and then talk about it afterwards.
Instead of thinking that your silence is reflective of something negative perhaps you could start thinking about it as a sign that you are so well attuned to each others presence that nothing much needs to be said.
Whatever happens try to relax around her and do not let the lack of conversation get the better of you. The more you think about it the more you could freak out. It will happen eventually, just give it some time.
Whenever you are unsure about things between the both of you because of an absence of words make sure that you let her know how much you still like her and care for her. If you cannot think of anything else to say to her, at least emphasise this.
It does not take much to say '<her name> I really like you and care about you a lot'. These few words combined with your focus on her happiness is more potent than any amount of words that you can talk to her about.
Good luck with it - Bud.
Although your situation is quite peculiar it by no means indicates that you were not meant to be together and neither does it signify anything bad. In that you have had flowing conversations with her before is definitily a positive that you can aim for again.
It might not be a bad idea to share your feelings with her on the present situation and see what she thinks of the whole ordeal. From the things that you have described previously it is obvious that there is a mutual amount of attraction and interest from both sides. Perhaps if you lay it out on the table for the both of you to
see you might be able to figure out a way to deal with the situation together.
It might be the case that you want to start doing a common activity like doing a puzzle or going for a game of bowls that will start the conversation going again. Think of activities that the both of you can do together and then talk about it afterwards.
Instead of thinking that your silence is reflective of something negative perhaps you could start thinking about it as a sign that you are so well attuned to each others presence that nothing much needs to be said.
Whatever happens try to relax around her and do not let the lack of conversation get the better of you. The more you think about it the more you could freak out. It will happen eventually, just give it some time.
Whenever you are unsure about things between the both of you because of an absence of words make sure that you let her know how much you still like her and care for her. If you cannot think of anything else to say to her, at least emphasise this.
It does not take much to say '<her name> I really like you and care about you a lot'. These few words combined with your focus on her happiness is more potent than any amount of words that you can talk to her about.
Good luck with it - Bud.
#3 Guest_pionneer_*
Posted 30 September 2006 - 02:59 PM
hey peejay Bud is right.
My thoughts are that you should not think of this as a negative, instead I think that because your relationship with each other has progressed things have become more serious. Perhaps you both have things on your mind that you want to openly discuss, perhaps you are making steps to create more personal conversation about how you feel towards each other but although you want to talk more seriously you find it difficult. With that on your minds other things seem trivial.
Whatever it may be, the next time your stuck for words just relax, take her hand and ask what shes thinking about.
good luck
My thoughts are that you should not think of this as a negative, instead I think that because your relationship with each other has progressed things have become more serious. Perhaps you both have things on your mind that you want to openly discuss, perhaps you are making steps to create more personal conversation about how you feel towards each other but although you want to talk more seriously you find it difficult. With that on your minds other things seem trivial.
Whatever it may be, the next time your stuck for words just relax, take her hand and ask what shes thinking about.
good luck
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